Heavyweight Champion boxer Tyson Fury has opened up about his current situation and confessed to taking "loads of cocaine".
Fury was scheduled for a rematch with Wladimir Klitschko at the end of this month but the match was then cancelled, with Fury said to be "medically unfit" to compete.
The boxer then claimed to retire from boxing in a series of tweets, but then retracted and vowed to return at some point down the line.
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It was then revealed five days ago that Fury tested positive for cocaine on September 22.
Fury's close friend and fellow traveller Billy Joe Saunders shared details of the dark place Fury is in, but now Fury himself has opened up about his situation.
In an interview with Rolling Stone, when asked about allegedly using cocaine, he said:
"Listen, I've done a lot of things in my life. I've done lots of cocaine. Lots of it. Why shouldn't I take cocaine? It's my life isn't it? I can do what I want. Yeah, I have done cocaine. Plenty of people have done cocaine as well. What the f**k has that got to do with anything? That ain't a performance enhancing drug. Am I not allowed to have a life now as well? Do they want to take my personal life off me too? I've not been in a gym for months. I've not been training. I've been going through depression. I just don't want to live anymore, if you know what I'm saying. I've had total enough of it. They've forced me to the breaking edge. Never mind cocaine. I just didn't care. I don't want to live anymore. So cocaine is a little minor thing compared to not wanting to live anymore."
Fury says psychiatrists have deemed him to be "a manic depressive" and went as far as saying that he has suicidal thoughts ever day, which he believes all stems from boxing and the people involved.
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"I was a lot happier when I wasn't the world champion because people wasn't giving me as much shit. People wasn't wanting me to do all these bad things so much. Listen I've been pushed to the brink. I can't take no more. I'm in a hospital at the moment. I'm seeing psychiatrists. Everything. They say I've got a version of bipolar. I'm a manic depressive. All from what they've done to me. All this s**t through boxing, through taking titles, through writing me off. I beat the best man but I'm still s**t.
"I used to love boxing when I was a kid. It was my life. All the way through it was my life. You finally get to where you need to be and it becomes a big mess. And that's it. I hate boxing now. I wouldn't even go across the road to watch a world title fight. That's what its done to me. I don't even want to wake up. I hope I die every day. And that's a bad thing to say when I've got three children and a lovely wife isn't it? But I don't want to live anymore. And if I could take me own life - and I wasn't a Christian - I'd take it in a second. I just hope someone kills me before I kill me self. I'll have to spend eternity in hell."
The 28-year old says he stopped taking drugs and alcohol on the first of this month and will at least try to shake off his demons for the sake of his family.
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"I'm trying to forget about it all. I'm putting boxing behind me, the drinking, the drugs, just getting back in the church and right with God. Cause that's all that matters with me. Other people's opinions and what they gotta write and what they gotta say about me, all the negativity, all the charges in the world doesn't mean nothing, because I just want to go to heaven, I want my family to go to heaven, and that's it, that's all that matters to me. Because material things are no good.
"I've got to try to get me family back on track, get me wife back, you know. I've got to start doing things and manning up a bit, because there are a lot people out there, a lot worse off than me in life, and no matter how depressed I get, I've got three beautiful children here, and they've got a life and what would they do without a father?"
Fury then said that it would be the last interview he would take part in as he looks get back in the right mental state.
(h/t Rolling Stone)
Featured Image Credit:Topics: Tyson Fury, Boxing, Wladimir Klitschko